50 CENT EXPANDS HIS MERCH EMPIRE TO INCLUDE JIMMY HATS
Just days after announcing a G-UNIT book line, 50 CENT has added condoms to his growing line of gangsta rap tie-ins. What's next for Fiddy? We've got our money on a line of feminine hygiene products with the tagline "Get fresh or die trying."

I didn't know how to word that any other way (the last line especially. Hilarious!). That was in a Rock Daily email from Rolling Stone sometime last week. At first I couldn't figure out what they were talking about. But then I realized, and oh my God. That's hilarious. How ridiculous. How stupid.

How genius. Because you know people are going to buy them. People have to ensure, after all, that their g-units are hip too.

And the fact that Fiddy came up with this idea astonishes me (if he, in fact, was the one who came up with it). This is incredible. I don't even know what to say. Fiddy, I salute you. The fact that he can play on his pseudo-macho bullshit image (then again, he was shot 9 times... and lived) to get people to spend (probably) more money than necessary, amazes me. But at least he's promoting safe sex, right? We don't need any more Fiddy in this world. Incredible idea, really. This... this is why I <3 Rock Stars (and rap ones too, I guess).